IAAPA Havoc August 1, 1999
Volume 3, Number 6



.......Knight goeth knude?.......

..........A "Robe" begins a furor as he publicly humiliates one of
IAAPA's "Grandfather" figures..........

All This....and MORE....in this month's issue of







IAPPA Havoc











Notes From the Front



Game 5689

Axis: micwil
Allies: RedBaron

#4 - E US SZ
W Panama SZ 1 FTR

Total Japan v. US --- 1 FTR v. 3 TRN

Total Attacker hits: 1
Total Defender hits: 0

So far so good, lock and load for round 2.

1 ftr vs. 2 trn

Total Attacker hits: 1
Total Defender hits: 0

OK, that covers the goat, now its only skill...

1 ftr vs. 1 trn

Total Attacker hits: 1
Total Defender hits: 0

"I love it when a plan comes together" - (old A Team quote)

1 FTR (unbelievably lucky and counting its blessings, slowly putting
away the hari kari sword in its case) lands on W Indies SZ AC

Hmmmm. Quoting from "The A Team"....that explains quite a bit.
But...."Covers the goat"?....that must be a Canadian thing....


Game 6306

Axis: EJGusto
Allies: Leone@

Combat
Attack 1 trns in FWA sz with 1 BMR from Germany

Result: Both killed. Question is...did the bomber hit first and the
trns hit on its way to the bottom? Or did the trns hit first and the
BMR crashed into the trns? We'll never know.....

Or did a certain stranger in armour give himself a very bad headache
trying to figure it out?


Game 6426

GM: polaris@
Axis: DreadSquid
Allies: JEA2JEA

In U.S.S.R. 1 of game 6426, the U.S.S.R. attacked Ukraine with 8 inf.
and 3
arm.
The pitiful German defenders failed to hit anything, and Ukr. fell to
Russia
with no loss.
The very good GM made a small error in not noting the 1 extra inf. and 2

extra arm. that had been bid in the Ukr.
On the reroll.....
the extra Germans still failed to hit anything.

On the counterattack on Ukr. in Ger. 1, the Axis commander accidentally
added
an extra armor which he didn't have into the battle. Of course, that
had no
effect as the territory was still held by the Russians with 2 arm.

Not exactly what we'd call blitzkrieg.

The Knight could have warned you about JEA2JEA's skill with the
cubes....On the other hand....how about a game, DS?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Game 6428

Axis: micwil
Allies: Komp

The Barney Fife award is shared by Micwil and Komp for this wonderful
piece of combat:

Total Germany v. USSR --- 3 INF v. 1 INF

Three rounds later: 2 inf v. 1 inf

An ADDITIONAL 11 rounds later, Germany recaptures Ukr with 2 inf.


Havoc's Food Section???


I received a recipe for "German Fried Chicken" this month from Sohoa,
but I'm not sure what to do with it. I don't know if a monthly recipe
would be popular or not......so why don't you let me know? If so I've
got one for next month :) If you can't wait until then I'll be glad to
forward it to you now :)


Knight Muse


To Assist and Amuse is the Motto of Havoc.....and the Mission of the
Knight Errant.

Mount Iaapa rises steeply above the Ana Lowlands. It's peak is hidden
behind a perpetual veil of thick, rolling clouds. Those that dwell
amongst the clouds are known as Robes for the magnificent flowing robes
which they've adopted as their uniform. The splendor and length of the
robe directly corresponds to the importance of the Robe. The more
powerful the Robe, the longer and more elegant the robe.

Robes very seldom find themselves mixing with the Lowlanders simply
because their duties keep them busy behind the clouds. The Lowlanders,
on the other hand, feel rejected by the Robes....yet not very many have
the bravery to climb the mountain in order to learn the responsibilities
of a Robe.

One day, for reasons still unclear, all of the Robes found themselves
wandering through the Lowlands. As they stumbled about, searching for
the best route back to the clouds, the Lowlanders surrounded them. The
Robes clustered together as the crowd began taunting and threatening
them. Fearing for their safety, the Robe Mage began to summon a force
field from the earth. As the invisible wall slowly began to rise, a
young child's voice rose above the din of the mob, "Look! The Knight
has no Robe!!"

Everyone turned to look at the Knight, who looked around at his fellow
robes, and then down at his own robe of which he'd been so proud. Only
then did he realize that the Robe Quartermaster had issued him a tutu.

The Lowlanders began to chuckle. The Robes began to snicker. Soon
every person in both groups was laughing uncontrollably.

The Knight raised his sword high and said, "I may not have the nicest
robe...I may not have the longest robe...but if my robe can make you
smile, then it has done its job."

To assist and amuse.....and perhaps a little perspective once in awhile.

EK


Knight Mail


Dear Errant Knight,

It seems that a certain club official has chosen to embarrass me in his
recent mass-mailing. The saddest part is that I thought he was my
friend! Since I do not have the ability to reply in kind, I am hoping
that you will print my retort so that I might also be heard.

Thank you.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
High Cmmdr,

Perhaps you've been sucking back on Grandpa's Cough Medicine a little
too often because it seems you've forgotten a few minor details.

1. Two of your "victories" were with "Experimental" bids/strategies,
and were both UNOFFICIAL games.

2. Of the five remaining games you once wrote that two of them were
"ALL DICE, BABY!!" I try to never blame dice for my losses, but against
you that is practically impossible. Especially when you pull off one of
your 13% odds-crushers. The next time you come to Las Vegas I am taking
you to the Craps table....and betting everything I've got on you. I
don't see how you could ever "seven - out" since I've never seen you
roll anything higher than a three!!

3. When we began our latest game you mentioned that I should have bid
higher. I'm still puzzling over that one. If I'd gotten a higher bid
the game would have been like Einstein playing against Goofy. Hulk
Hogan taking on Minnie Mouse was bad enough, thank you.

4. If you have replenished your stock of Kleenex and Depends, perhaps
you would like to settle this argument. I hereby challenge you to a
World Series of A&A, High Cmmdr. I think the members of this club have
the right to know the true meaning of your handle. The High Cmmdr is
only High because he is filled with a lot of hot air! Let's make a
little wager on this World Series, just to make it exciting. The loser
must post a notice on the IAAPA Bulletin Board, which will read:

"AxisSpec is absolutely the greatest player I have ever encountered. I
wish I could play as well as he does, but I will never be smart enough
to learn the game that well."

(signed) High Cmmdr

5. The appropriate alterations will be made in the unlikely event that
you win the WSA&A.

6. I think we should open this GMless match to the public, and CC
anyone who is interested. I'll bet there is an entire cult of IAAPA
members who'd like to see you crushed into teeny tiny little
pieces...........again.

I await your reply.

~ AxisSpec

.....Go get him AS! (And put me on the CC list :)


I would like to play a simpile game of A&A.Right from the box with out
biddding can that be done?

~ name withheld

I don't know. Will your big brother let you in his room?


Well we use the valanets from Todd Vomit?I think that's his name and
those are really good.I like them my friends like them also.

MOrab46019

Huh?


Membership dropping? First I have heard. BB's @AOL have always been
slow.
Officials tend to do an alright job. You get what you pay for, is not
exactly
true. I pay nothing but have a bunch of fun. Thanks to those who make
the
Club work.

~ OtheRDAS

I second that emotion.


IAAPA Elections


IAAPA needs members who want to be a part of the continuing growth of
our club. The elections are right around the corner, and there are
still many positions which only have a single candidate. If you are
interested in helping to guide the direction of your club, then please
go to the website and check out all of the available government
positions which will be filled during this election. Club officers put
in quite a bit of extra work, so make sure you choose something that
interests you and to which you'd be willing to dedicate some of your
free time.

If you're not happy with the club leadership then this is your chance to
change it.


Recon Squad


Do you have an interesting or humorous A&A story? Is there something
that makes your blood pressure skyrocket and your face turn purple?
Would you enjoy sharing/warning other IAAPA members? The IAAPA Havoc
has a severe shortage of intelligence and desperately needs
reconnaissance volunteers. Contributions will be accredited to either
your email address, or preferably your Association Alias. All
intelligence reports should be forwarded thru channels to the S-3
Officer at: havoc@axisandallies.net

Errant Knight

IAAPA Havoc Contributors:

micwil
HighCmmdr
DesertShadow

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