There's a lot of things to get
to this month, so let's just cut to the chase...
IAPPA Havoc
Notes From the Front
Game 5566, jdenec@ vs. Ertu
Hitler shakes his head as the Lufftwaffe returns
home at 50 percent
strong. "You fools!!! You cannot even carry
out a simple mission. One
transport fleet in the Atlantic, just one,
and you fail to sink them!"
"Commander, execute these men!!"
ES: Apparently Hitler doesn't like losing those
FTR vs. TRN battles any
more than we do.
Game 6261, hoquista vs. bmf63
In other news, the Japanese swarm into Chinking
{china},
New Delhi, and Soviet Asia.
ES: Other news!? What the heck was the main
story? The Apocalypse?
Game unk sohoha vs. Crusader (cwmcbride)
Dear Mr Mcbride.
I am Olyn's father and I am taking the time
to write this letter to
you about my son. I believe that he is a very
smart boy for nine years of
age and needs to be nurtured in order for
him to reach his full potential. I
was against him playing this AA game over
the Internet for I was afraid of
people much older than him, taking advantage
of his youth.
I would appreciate it if you could find it
in your great Texan heart
to let my son win a battle or two. He was
up all night crying in his sleep 4
out of 4, 4 out of 4 . I do not know
what this means and thought that maybe
you did and could help for he needs his sleep.
I am very glad that you will be of help and will thank you now.
Mr. Olyn his dad
EK ~ Sorry Mr. Olyn. Texans are very
competitive. I don't like your
chances.
Game 6726 AxisSpec vs. FLATONYC
The following comments began on UK1, and continued
until UK2 with Tony
and I cracking each other up.
UK1: Bratwurst cart obliterated by RAF bomber for 1 IPC damage.
J1: Same thing...must be getting pointers
from Brits...some minor
damage to a nearby corn field...local residents
report popcorn falling
from the sky. 1 IPC damage.
US1: The bratwurst vendor looks to the
skies. "Mein Gott! Nein! Nein!
Nein!!" This time he is not so lucky,
and he joins his wares as they fly through
the city streets. 1 IPC damage.
Nearsighted bmb pilot lands in Russia.
G2: bmb brought down by a bunch
of kids throwing rocks while on way to
do 1 ipc of damage.
UK2: Apparently the British have developed
heavy bombers on the sly as
the Karelian IC suffers more damage than all
of the previous missions
(spread out between 4 bombers and 3 countries)
were able to collectively
achieve. 4 IPC damage. Germans
fear collapse of DM and march in
Schweinfurt.
Squire Speaketh
I mean, come on, it's only a bunch of people
playing a game. How much
work could be required to run a little gamer's
club? It's not too hard,
in fact the government members are probably
just swimming in extra time.
And now that we've returned from FantasyLand,
allow me to point out the
gruesome reality. Most people in our
club government are swamped with
stuff to do. Almost everyone could use
an assistant, even if it's only
for something small. I remember the
day, so long ago, when I first
showed upon my Knight's doorstep, seeking
a place to put my skills to
good use. Well, my suggestion to all
of you is to do pretty much the
same thing. Look through the club government
on the web page, and find
something that interests you. Maybe
you're good with programming and
could work on the website, maybe you like
meet new people and can help
out the Minister of Recruiting, or maybe you
would just like to discuss
the current state of Ukrainian socioeconomic
intervention in the
Balkans. Whatever you can help out with,
I'm sure there's room for
you. We'll be waiting.
ES
Knight Muse
Wow. What a month! So much happened
here in Castle Shannon that I hope
I can remember it all. The Knight finally
got to trade in his tutu for
a mini-skirt but the Supply Sergeant warned
me, "Don't get too fond of
it. We've got tutus on back-order, pal."
Apparently there's been a
shortage of tutus with all the new members
of government receiving their
first robe.
I've noticed a trend in submissions to Havoc
and I'm going to try to
alter its course. Havoc is actually
supposed to have funny stuff in
it, but lately it seems more like a bulletin
board for dice-whining :)
Henceforth if you wish to share a dice-whine
with Havoc....make sure it
has something funny included ~ like the first
"Note from the Front"
above.
Around the middle of the month Mrs. Knight
came to my study and gave me
"the eye". Ever observant, I immediately
knew something was disturbing
her and asked, "Is something wrong, honeypie?"
At that very moment a
head popped around the corner and a pint sized
urchin smiled goofily in
my direction. It turned out that he
was left on the drawbridge by
person(s) unknown, and since he couldn't even
tell us his name, I
decided against confusing him with more difficult
questions. Rest
assured that the guard who forgot to raise
the drawbridge won't be
seeing daylight for a very long time.
Some good did come out of this, however, as
it seems that the lad isn't
quite as dumb as one would assume from the
blank look in his eyes ~ and
he seems fairly well behaved. I've developed
a bit of a soft spot for
him, and he's fallen in love with the name
we gave him. I can't wait
until the day that I hear him say "Errant"
instead of "Ewwant" in his
cute Elmer Fudd accent. Who knows?
Maybe someday he'll push me out the
door and take over all of the Havoc duties.
We'll work up to that
gradually, though, because I'm just not ready
to retire yet. I'm having
too much fun :) (Please welcome ErrntSquire)
Oh, Oh, OH!! I almost forgot the BEST
news! I actually won 2 games
this month! I must be improving.
If you haven't heard already, the Knight has
taken on new
responsibilities in the club. Fortunately
it's another easy job, like
writing Havoc, so I won't need to give up
playing so I'll have enough
time to fulfill my duties. I've completely
rewritten the CD-ROM rules
in order to make it easier for IAAPA members
to make the jump to the
Zone. If you want to get started playing
games over the net then check
out the CD-ROM FAQ link on the main page of
IAAPA's website. If you run
into anything that isn't covered in the CD
rules please let me know!
I've played a ton of games in the Zone, and
I wracked my brain to see if
there were any bugs I'd forgotten about....but
I don't think I missed
anything. Don't be intimidated by the
complicated methods which are
described in Section V. The rules are
very detailed, and may seem
complicated, but once you learn the procedures
it is all very simple.
The CD isn't perfect.....but it's still a
great way to play. Playing
the CD is similar to playing the board game
with all those bombers that
only have 1 wing....or the infantry that won't
stand up anymore....or
the board that you can barely read anymore.....you
get used to it.
EK
P.S. If all your bombers have 2 wings,
you don't play enough. :)
Knight Mail
What's up with that... it all evens out huh?
How? This is the same
game that started out with Jap1 sending 4inf,
2ftr, 1bom vs China 2inf,
1ftr. After 2 rounds the 2ftr and bom
returned home and left China with
2inf, 1ftr (about 1 in a 1000 there.)
Try to recover from that Axis
players! Boys, I teach math and I'm
here to tell you "the odds don't
always even out!" Sure, a lot of novice
players use the odds as an
excuse. But some games you just get
ripped in almost every battle (or
at least the ones that matter most.)
Now in the long run it does all
even out, but I pity the poor soldier who
has to take the gank against
me to even out for the game I'm having now!
~ Bones
EK ~ The point is: even if a battle only has
a 1 in a million chance of
success, eventually it does succeed that 1
time and there's no point in
getting an ulcer over it. :)
I would like to know if the newly elected
officials are considered
Robes? I am not sure if the title Robe is
only given to the top
officials in the club such as Pres., V.Pres.,
etc. I want to say that I
believe that only the true "Robes" should
be allowed to have the special
code for the dice server , after all they
do a lot of unappreciated work
and do deserve something for their efforts.
I know that when Micwil put
together the wonderful web site along with
the other elves of the
computer world , he worked very hard at very
thankless job. I say to all
you "Robes" thanks for your time and effort.
I want you to know that I
for one just does not care if your can cause
the dice to do tricks I
will always accept the story "boy the dice
are sure acting strange". You
guys can keep the code to yourselves as a
little insiders perk. We and I
mean all of us grunts in the club can beat
you anyway or at least make
you think a lot more than is necessary to
win even with the code.
I say in closing that we should only
allow the top rungs of the ladder
to have this privilege and not just any elected
official.
~ sohaha
EK ~ According to the latest Robe Memo, Micwil-23978.98,
the ADS has
been adjusted to make room for the new robes.
Sr. robes will now
receive a -2 to all rolls and Jr. robes will
get the "-1 to all rolls"
GMI (Government Member Incentive). Unfortunately
this doesn't help me
out much, but at least now I'll be getting
hits with my BB's and
bmb's...
Oh....also....challenge AxisSpec. He'll
play anybody. :)
Recon Squad
Do you have an interesting or humorous A&A
story? Is there something
that makes your blood pressure skyrocket and
your face turn purple?
Would you enjoy sharing/warning other IAAPA
members? The IAAPA Havoc
has a severe shortage of intelligence and
desperately needs
reconnaissance volunteers. Contributions
will be accredited to either
your email address, or preferably your Association
Alias. All
intelligence reports should be forwarded thru
channels to the S-3
Officer at: havoc@axisandallies.net
Errnt Knt
and his little buddy,
ErrntSquire